“The opposite of play isn’t work but depression”
Dr Brown
Life has a habit of getting busy, sometimes it’s important to step back and assess if what you are spending your time doing is giving you a sense of balance. While it can be important to focus on accomplishments, if everything we do is purposeful striving things can get monotonous and draining. To play – that is to have fun can seem frivolous and at times people might feel guilty for not doing something productive.
I have made it a bit of a mini mission to help people prioritise play and enjoyment in their lives and I hope this post can go some way of debunking the idea that play isn’t important as well as providing spring boards for how to start experimenting with different types of activities to discover what play might look like for you.
Why is play important?
We all know that play is important for children, as a way to develop and learn but as we age play seems to be something we don’t have time for. Play suddenly becomes immature and our crowded busy life puts more emphasis on work, responsibility and commitments.
But play is vital all through our life, the quote above "The opposite of play isn't work but depression" indicates to impactful play is – it provides a source of good emotions, expands our mastery and helps us to relax. It can help with your sense of self-esteem and is an accessible way to think about a well rounded self-care technique.
What is play?
Play often looks purposeless and done for its own sake, the pleasure we get from play keeps us engaged and drives us to return to activities we enjoy.
It has been argued that play an inherent need, the work of neuroscientist Jaak Panksepp concluded that play arises in the human brain stem where survival mechanisms (like breathing, sleep and consciousness) originate. This inbuilt initial activation then connects and activates pleasurable emotions that accompany playing. Play is crucial for infant development but unlike most other species that stop play activities when they mature, humans can continue play-like behaviours as adults. Play helps the brain to keep developing, adapting, learning about the world and finding new ways to enjoy it. Without play our behaviour becomes fixed and we are less interested in new and different things and we find fewer opportunities to take pleasure in the world which reduces how we feel about ourselves and may contribute to lower levels of self-esteem.
As well as the protective factors against depression, through creative arts and celebrations play contributes to the formation of our shared culture and common humanity. Common humanity, to see ourselves as part of a bigger picture, is an important aspect of self-compassion which along with continual growth also impacts our self-esteem levels.
What are the barriers to play?
In popular culture there is a sense that we need to increase productivity to gain social status and symbols of success. Along with this comes huge responsibility and a never ending to do list. Without the intention of prioritising play it is likely that day to day living will leave us with insufficient time or energy to play.
A further barrier to play, that self-compassion might help to guard against is a fear of judgement. In Developing a prototype for a playfulness tool kit Hövels identifies that adults lose their playfulness because with growing responsibilities our seriousness also increases. Being seen as a serious person is typically associated with expert-status and professionalism and could be argued to portray a more developed adult persona. You could alter this idea of play being childish and serious being adult by acknowledging how important our ability to think creatively and flexibly is, we can develop these skills through play.
Benefits of play?
The benefits of play relate to increased autonomy, experimentation and growth. Even though at first you might have to find your motivation to start playing because it can at first feel like another thing to do, play replenishes you and offers another way to rest and recharge your battery. Once you start to make space in your diary for play it will become an important part of your diary.
1. It is fun and is self-motivated, we are drawn to do it because it feels good.
2. Authentic self - play provides a space to develop who we really are because it is something we chose to do, that you enjoy it allows your whole self to emerge.
3. A growth state - play allows us to explore their capabilities of what we can and cannot yet do and extend your competencies which in turn can improve self-confidence.
4. Flow state – when playing we get lost in the activity and are unaware of the passage of time.
5. Less self-aware – during play we are less likely to worry about how good we look or how clever we seem because we are fully in the moment. This is especially beneficial if you spend a lot of time wrapped up in thoughts about yourself.
6. More creative – play immerses us in an enjoyable activity where we experiment with new things that might not go as planned, so it gives us a chance to practice responding to unexpected events rather than continuing to live on autopilot. This can increase flexibility and self-trust.
How to figure out what you enjoy?
I hear a lot of people feel so disconnected with play that they don’t really remember what they would like to do, or where to start.
What did you enjoy doing as a child or teen?
Joining groups that facilitate activities you are curious about is a great way to schedule play as well as getting all the benefits listed above from playing it is also a chance to socialise and meet new people.
The National Institute for Play (NIFP) and is an advocate for the importance of play. It identifies different play personality types and suggests that people might be a blend of several different play styles. Reading through this list might be a starting point to see which style resonates with you and perhaps spark an idea of what you might enjoy doing.
The Joker
The joker embodies a classic playful personality and for the joker, play revolves around some kind of nonsense fun, fun for funs sake, maybe you were the class clowns and continue into adulthood enjoying practical jokes and making other people laugh.
The Mover/Kinesthete
The mover is happiest when they are in motion for example, dancing, walking, swimming, football yoga or playground games. Although they might play games, competition and winning isn’t the main focus. People with this play type might even find moving helps them to process information.
The Explorer
When we were children, we were all explorers learning to understand the world around us. As we grow people that enjoy explorer play type seek new experiences for example, visiting new places, having new feelings or discovering new information about the world we live in.
The Competitor
The competitor plays to win they look to be number 1 and if you keep track of sports teams then this could be your play type. They might be the competitor they might support team. A true competitor doesn't want an easy victory may try to level the playing field so that they know any victory they achieve is genuine.
The Director
Directors enjoy planning and putting on events. It might be hosting traditional family events, nights out or fundraisers, their style of play makes them natural organisers.
The Collector
The collector plays by curating a collection of objects or experiences. While it could be seen as a solo pursuit they might socialise with people with the same interests and connect via their shared passion.
The Artist/Creator
They play by making things, which could be functional, creative, or just for fun. Obvious examples include painting, woodwork, pottery, knitting and gardening, but practical tasks like taking apart a mechanical item, repairing it and putting it back together would also be an example of a creator.
The Storyteller
Storytellers play through their imagination, creating new worlds to read or perform. They also enjoy reading, watching films, dramas and theatre productions.
Learning about play types as a game changer for me because it helped me to look for opportunities to incorporate play within my life. It also helped me identify things that I didn’t find fun and to step back from them, for example the PTA at my child’s school, I was there out of a sense of obligation and duty, but if all the other people in the room were there because it was their play type I realised I should let them do what they enjoy and free up my time for activities that are playful for me.
Considering the importance of play it is far from childish. It has so many benefits and fulfils the core foundation of self-esteem which is made up of self-compassion, self-worth and continual growth and mastery. Play may also expand our social network, increase our confidence levels and replenish our energy. Far from being childish it is a useful, fun aspect of self-care.