Your mindset shapes how you interpret yourself, other people, and the world around you. It develops through life experiences, upbringing and culture, and often operates automatically. If we don’t pause to reflect on how we see things, we can miss how strongly our beliefs influence our decisions, relationships and self-talk. In many ways, mindset acts like a pair of glasses — if the lenses are smudged, everything we look at appears distorted. Only when we take them off do we r

You’ve sent an email to your line manager with a typo, you want the ground to open while you mentally tear yourself down. Going on Instagram sends you into a not good enough spiral – when did all your friends become so glamorous and sorted. Giving yourself a pep talk but it sounds more like a dark comedy roasting that you’d never say out loud to another living being. Being so tired at work because you couldn’t sleep for replaying conversations in your head and cringing all ov

You’re saying yes when internally you’re screaming NO. You cancel your own plans to keep the peace. You agree to projects you don’t have time for. You work far beyond your job description, often without being asked. You smile and nod, while resentment grows.   People pleasing isn’t kindness – it’s self-abandonment. It’s often a coping mechanism learned earlier in life. It’s time to replace it with boundaries that feel safe. Agreeing to extra responsibility at work, despite al

Counselling can help you to explore your anxiety by breaking it down into its component parts: the body, the mind and how this impacts our subsequent behaviour. Anxiety catches our attention because of how forcefully we can feel it in our bodies, our beating hearts, feeling sick to the stomach – that must mean something! And our brain is more than ready to explain where it’s coming from. There has to be an explanation because of how real our physical response is. Anxiety isn’

Confidence is defined as the belief or feeling that you can rely on something or someone, in this case yourself.  If you have a high level of confidence you feel secure enough to try new challenges and experience everything life has to offer.  One reason confidence grows is that if you know you have tried your best, even if things don't work out, setbacks will not define you because you’re grounded in your self-worth. Many people with low confidence are outwardly competent an

I often recommend journalling as a way to express thoughts and feelings, explore emotions, or engage in creative exercises. It’s also a practice I value in my own life. I tend to turn to writing when I feel overwhelmed and need a way to get things out of my system. Often, the process moves from venting towards finding a more compassionate or helpful response. I have also experienced the power of structured writing exercises, such as letter writing, both personally and in my w

Life has a habit of getting busy, and it can be important to step back and assess whether what you are spending your time doing is giving you a sense of balance. While it can be important to focus on accomplishments, if everything we do is purposeful striving things can get monotonous and draining. To play — to have fun — can seem frivolous, and many people feel guilty for not doing something productive.   I have made it something of a personal and professional mission to hel

Low self-esteem is something many people bring to counselling. Often, there’s a wish to understand where it came from and a hope that, if it could just be “fixed,” life would feel easier and more settled. Self-esteem refers to the value judgements we make about ourselves and our worth. It can fluctuate over time and across different areas of life. When self-esteem feels higher, you may experience yourself as capable, confident, and secure. When it feels lower, self-doubt, sel

Worrying is a mental process where our thoughts are constantly churning and analysing possible outcomes. Humans are unique in this ability and it can be beneficial when it helps you to perceive threats, predict opportunities and respond to both accordingly. Unfortunately, like anything, it can turn into an overused tool which veers more frequently towards a negative outcome. When this happens, worry can contribute to low mood and/or anxiety. Clients tell me that they believe

Self-esteem refers to how we see ourselves and the beliefs and opinions we have about ourselves.  It can be thought of as being on a continuum from low to high and often you may experience fluctuations in self-esteem depending on how confident and capable you feel in any situation. Low self-esteem is often something that people who enter counselling know that they struggle with and yet it can be a concept that is difficult to define.  This gives self-esteem an elusive quality

Many people come to counselling thinking it will be just like a chat with a friend, or that the counsellor is there to give them answers. These are common myths, so let’s explore what counselling really is — and why it can provide something friends, no matter how well-meaning, often can’t. Counsellors Aren’t There to Give Advice A counsellor is not an adviser who tells you what to do. There is rarely a single “correct” response to life’s challenges, and ultimately, you know y

Self-regulation refers to our ability to understand and manage our emotional, physical, and behavioural responses to the situations we encounter. Our capacity for self-regulation develops over time and is shaped by past experiences, attachment patterns, and learned coping strategies. You may notice that some emotions — such as anger, embarrassment, or excitement — feel more difficult to manage than others. Difficulties with self-regulation often become most visible in moments

Counselling is a professional service that offers a confidential space to explore who you are and the difficulties you’re facing. It can be a place to talk things through, make sense of patterns in your life, and better understand yourself in relation to others. What you share in counselling is treated with care and kept private, within clear professional boundaries. For many people, having a space where they don’t need to perform, explain themselves, or hold everything toget